


expressions/time flies

by fourthdimnsion



Series: Experimental and Not-Beta'd Poetries [3]
Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Bad Poetry, Eddie Isn't Alive, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Mentioned Losers Club (IT), mentioned benverly and hanbrough/bike
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-22
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:49:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26581672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fourthdimnsion/pseuds/fourthdimnsion
Summary: Eddie Kaspbrak's last words weren't the only memory that disturbs Richie, but they're what hurts the most.
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Series: Experimental and Not-Beta'd Poetries [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1883353
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	expressions/time flies

**Author's Note:**

  * For [reddierly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/reddierly/gifts).



> parabens ashlee tudo de bom pra ti bjs
> 
> to english readers: i haven't read the book by stephen king but i've seen muschietti's 2017-2019 ones so sorry if it's out of character. hope you enjoy!

_You know I… I..._

And Richie himself murmurs

_Please, finish the sentence_

_Please, end this_

_Please, let me breathe_

For once that he knows

he hadn’t felt peace for once

Richie looks in the mirror; asks, then

“what would you say” 

knowing that no answer would be seen

either to be heard in solemn silence

In the night he dreams of a voice

weak as the blow of autumn afternoons

freeing petals from their flowers

flying away as their destiny is as much as uncertain

as Eddie’s life with a wound in his chest

and Richie’s face is the only thing that he would appreciate 

while his eyes closes

and air is in vain

Then Richie wakes up 

he hadn’t sleep

he wasn’t happy 

he hadn’t a smile shaping his lips 

He wonders often 

he discerns where and when

time became nothing but a lapse 

day becomes night

and day turns into hourglass

nothing else seemed to be right

not anymore

Not that there’s something left open

not that he was the other man that right now

turned into a corpse in the worst local

that turns his mind inside out

but then, then what’s left to do 

when his pupils blur with a bright even more intense

than the sun and its stars

when caught into hands

as they’re dirty with the blood

from the one that he loved 

Richie yells

he yells so loud God can hear

he shouts into oblivion 

so gutural nobody can stop nor his organs

he cries and cries and hopes it stops 

he hopes that he doesn’t dreams of lulus 

he wishes and desires

nothing are meant up to reality

Possibilities goes up his head

his messy hair with white lines

there ain’t no flowers in this grass

as much as there’s no way he can make it real

Everyone lives

no one dies

there’s still life

on the right side of his bed

there’s still life 

and no more fear written

on the back of his mind

Bill and Mike are cherishing 

each other’s company

each other’s fate unwritten back then

Ben seems to be enjoying the absence

of no wounds on his flesh

Beverly doesn’t fear the blood anymore

turning into stronger than the red that once

painted walls until top of her own being

but Richie? 

Richie tries

he laughs

he drinks 

he plays 

he smiles with a glimpse of grief on the shine of his eyes

in the corner of his lips 

and on the expression marks age has given him 

he try, he fail, he try once again, he cry

but he’s still standing

_(yeah, yeah, yeah)_

But it’s funny to keep wondering 

what would’ve done 

what could’ve been true

if Eddie survived

Imagine all the jokes told

the laughter echoing in the house

all the intimacy developing into something more

every time there’s a touch

every time there’s an awkward smile

lovingly staring into each other’s eyes 

feeling of safe with or without or within arms 

but just the thought of it, just it

would make them less uneasy and remember that everything

is over

One year had passed and somehow it would end

somehow Richie would get along

somewhere Richie would think that it’s possible

to breathe without wondering 

what would Eddie say in his face

what would be Eddie’s last words

what would Eddie…

And, then, for once Richie closes his eyes

and believes that no other thing would’ve done

even though catching would be easier than leaving. 

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading <3 comments appreciated!


End file.
